Keep Your Fingers Crossed...

Tuesdays...
So, I paid a visit to my Plastic Surgeon.
When he walked into the Office...
The way he "looked" at me...
I just KNEW...
It's Time!

When I began the Reconstruction Process,
I was told...(Over,and Over, and...!)
That how my "new" skin "responded"
Would determine...
My Size...(Cup size, ladies!)
Go BIG...Or stay home, right?

Radiation...Does a "number" on the skin!
(They need to INCLUDE that in the Cancer brochures!)

But, me being the eternal optimist...
I can't even type that with a straight face!
Just this ONE time,
I WOULD have a "say" in the process...
Not my BODY!

Well...Do I even need to say it?

My skin has "expanded"..."stretched"...
As MUCH as it can...
(On the left, where they placed the "new" skin)
Due to my Radiation.

They CAN'T "fill" me with another drop of fluid...

So,
It's Time...

For the LAST Big Step...SURGERY!!!

One WOULD conclude by now...
I would be "used" to it.
(Well, ONE would be WRONG!)

Yet...AGAIN...
I'll be placed on a stretcher...
Rolled into a "cold" sterile room.
With BIG lights...
Could this possibly be my opportunity?
For Stardom?
Well, maybe...
If not for the SHARP, SHINY, Knives...
And, people wearing MASKS!

That will have my LIFE...In their hands!

Pity Party?

No, the invitations were LOST in the mail!

But, I'd like you to understand...

With ALL this...Breast Cancer...Chemo...Radiation

Reconstruction...

You are NOT a willing participant!

What I'm saying is...EVERYTHING...

YES, EVERYTHING!

Is for the most part...Out of your CONTROL...

I Mean...You just go ALONG...

Because you just want it ALL to be OVER!

Think about it...Indulge me, for just a moment.

We are raised ALL our lives..."Be Independent"...

"Don't let SOMEONE else...Tell you what to do!"

Right?

Then you get diagnosed...With Breast Cancer...

And, NOW...

In order to LIVE...

You do just the opposite...

Do you see my POINT...

Frustrating, just a little, huh?

So, these last 3 years...Inner turmoil...

That's BARELY touching the surface!

But...With ALL that in mind...

"Keep your fingers crossed for me"...

I'll be HOLDING my Breath!

Because in just SIX short weeks...

I'll be WHOLE...

Again...

Until Next Time...